Sunday, January 31, 2010

Things to do while in Evacuation Traffic

Part of being prepared for a storm, is to have something for your mental well-being. One thing that can add to the stress of a storm is evacuation traffic.

So here is a list of things to do while driving(or riding) at 5 miles per hour:

-Walk along side of your car and give it a nice waxing.

-Get "wave" started with car next to you

-Play "Guess What's on the Floor Mat"

-Set seat position to "lazy boy"

-Play hide and seek with petrified french fry

-turn a small profit by digging for loose change

-Play "What's That Smell?"

-Followed by "What's That Noise"

-At rest stop, try to get someone to help you change air in spare tire.

-Hold horn down and pretend that it is stuck

-Get a "horn wave" going

-Look at every car to see if you know them.....Hey its Bob...what are you doing here?

-Lament over decision to take interstate instead of back roads

-Eat all rations before the first stop

-Listen to Eat Pray Love on, wait, sorry, that will cause more stress and depression.

-Call radio station and ask Spud how to spell "ergo"

-Prank call Godell and tell him he won a vacation on Grand Isle, but he has to go on Wednesday. Or just tell him to go &(#@*^&^@*.

-When in Baton Rouge, complain to locals that their traffic is terrible.

-and the number one thing to do while in evacuation traffic.......sing like no one is listening.